Welcome to Procrastination Tactics, where I, the infamous Procrastination King, have been putting off writing about myself for years.
But fear not, dear reader, for I have finally succumbed to the pressure and created this magnificent page about my own magnificence.
As a master of the art of doing nothing, I have developed a range of techniques that will make you wonder how I've managed to achieve so little in life.
Check out my Time Management subpage for tips on how to waste hours on social media.
Or, if you're feeling particularly lazy, head over to my Procrastination Hacks subpage for expert advice on how to avoid doing actual work.
And if you're feeling particularly masochistic, you can always check out my Procrastination Prophets subpage for inspirational stories of prophets who have achieved greatness through sheer, utter inaction.
So, what are you waiting for? Start procrastinating today!