Propaganda Of The Month: "Buy More Widgets!"

This month's propaganda of choice: buying more widgets. Because, let's be real, you can never have too many widgets. And if you don't have enough, you'll be left behind in the widget revolution!

Widget Stats:

• Widget count: 1,467,823,456
• Widget-to-Human ratio: 3.7:1
• Widget-to-Sanity ratio: 0.01:1 (we're working on it)

Widget of the Month:

Our widget of the month is the Widgetron 9000, a sleek and powerful widget that does... well, we're still working on what it does.

Widget Sales:

Get yours today! Buy 100 widgets, get 50% off! (Limited time only, don't miss out)