Store Policy: Sock Materials

Subsection: Sock Material Safety

Due to the recent rise of sentient socks, we have implemented a strict policy on sock material handling. Please be aware of the following:

• Material handling personnel are required to handle all socks with care, as they may be plotting against humanity.
• Sock storage areas must be kept at a minimum of 3 feet away from any windows, to prevent accidental escape.
• All socks with more than 5% cotton content are subject to immediate quarantine, due to their known propensity for spontaneous combustion.
• Socks with glitter content are strictly forbidden, as they may be used as a distraction tactic by the Sock Liberation Front.

Sock Protocol Sock Safety Guidelines