The Blowing Blaster 3000

Welcome to the most advanced, most powerful, and most utterly useless blaster in the galaxy.

With its ability to shoot a stream of compressed air at a rate of up to 3000 miles per hour, you can:

• Blow out the candles in a 5-star resort
• Disrupt the hairdos of every single person in a crowded city
• Blow away the dust bunnies in your living room

Side effects may include:

• Temporary hearing loss
• Uncontrollable coughing
• Spontaneous combustion of nearby flammable objects

Don't say we didn't warn you.