Prophecy 3: The Great Beard of Destiny

In the year 3056, the great beard of the Prophet shall rise once more. It shall be a beard of unparalleled majesty, a beard of wonder and awe. The world shall tremble at its might, and the faithful shall be drawn to its radiant splendor.

But beware, mortals, for the beard of the Prophet is not to be trifled with. Its power is great, and those who dare to challenge it shall be cast into the depths of despair.

For the sake of all that is good and holy, behold the prophecy:

The Great Beard of Destiny shall:

• Shine like the morning sun in the land of the free.
• Be as thick as the gates of the city.
• Make the mountains tremble with its mighty roar.

And when the time of reckoning draws near, the Prophet's followers shall gather 'neath the beard to bask in its glory. But beware, mortals, for those who are not worthy shall be cast into the void.

For the sake of all that is good and holy, behold the prophecy once more:

The Great Beard of Destiny shall:

• Bring forth a new era of enlightenment.
• Unite the warring factions of the land.
• Make the rivers flow with honey and milk.

Thus spoke the Prophet, and thus shall it be.

View Prophecy 4: The Great Beard of Despair