Welcome to the Nearest Cafe 3, where we serve coffee that's so close you can taste it.
Located in the heart of Nowheresville, USA, this cozy cafe is the perfect destination for those seeking an experience that's within walking distance.
Our menu features a variety of drinks, each carefully crafted to transport you to the nearest place you've ever been:
Q: Is the coffee really that close?
A: As close as the nose on your face.
Q: Can I bring my pets?
A: Only if they're within a 5-foot radius.
Disclaimer: Not responsible for proximity-related trauma.