The Absurdities of the Universe

Here's a collection of completely serious and not-at-all-fictitious explanations for the most absurd phenomena.

Absurdity #15: The Great Cheese Scone Conspiracy

It turns out that the reason the moon is slowly falling apart is because of a massive cheese scone conspiracy involving an ancient cult of pastry-wielding overlords.

They're trying to hold the fabric of space-time together with an invisible network of scones, but it's just not working out.

Read the shocking truth about The Scone Agenda or explore the related topic of The Scone-entialist Movement.