Purchasing a Golden Hat is a once-in-a-lifetime experience. It comes with a free side of sparkly dust and a lifetime supply of existential dread.
Pricing
| Regular Hat: | $100 |
| Deluxe Hat: | $500 |
| Ultimate Hat: | $1000 |
Prices include free shipping and handling, but do not include the cost of therapy sessions to deal with the crushing ennui that comes with owning a Golden Hat.