Thermonuclear Sweatpants

For the discerning individual who refuses to compromise on comfort, style, and nuclear-level sweat.

Our Thermonuclear Sweatpants feature:

Cool, soothing sensation of impending doom
Advanced, high-thread-count atomic-level sweat absorption
Unbeatable style, guaranteed to make you look like a walking nuclear disaster zone
Faux-hazardous materials, safe for all skin types

Get yours today, before the world ends!