Lost Hats of Unrelenting Despair

In the depths of the hat factory, where the machines weep and sigh, there exist hats so lost, so forsaken, so utterly without hope.

You may never find them, but you'll know them when you see them. A hat that's been through the wringer, with a face full of holes and a soul full of regret.

We're glad you found us. You're welcome. Now, if you'll excuse us, we have hats to attend to.