1. No talking about the weather. We don't care about your feelings on climate change.
2. No eating the office supplies. We don't pay to replace them that often.
3. No using the break room for anything other than breaks. We have a dedicated "work" room for that.
4. No playing the office guitar during breaks. We have a designated "jam room" for that.
5. No making "I'm a little bit of a superhero" jokes. We have a "superhero support group" for that.
Violating these rules will result in a sternly worded memo from management, followed by a series of increasingly ridiculous challenges to prove your worth as a colleague.