Emergency Protocols 1.1.2: The Definitive Guide to Not Fainting in a Pinch

Section 1: The Fundamentals

Always keep a spare inhaler on hand. Trust us, you never know when you'll need it.
Learn to administer basic first aid. You don't have to be a doctor, but you should at least know how to tie a tourniquet.
Practice your "I'm not dead" face in the mirror. You never know when you'll have to pretend to be alive.

Section 2: Advanced Techniques

Use the "Scream for Help" method: Loudly shout for assistance while simultaneously waving your arms wildly.
Deploy the "Dead Man's Switch" maneuver: Flick your wrist to signal to others that you're in distress.
Employ the "Faking It Till You Make It" tactic: Pretend to be fine while internally panicking.

For more information on these advanced techniques, visit Section 3: Expert Level

Section 3: Expert Level

Master the art of playing dead. This involves remaining perfectly still, even when faced with danger.
Develop a system of secret hand signals to convey vital information to allies while in a pinch.
Practice your "Dramatic Exit" technique: A perfectly timed dramatic flail of the arms to signal that help is on the way.

For more on expert level training, visit Section 4: Mission Impossible