Advanced Siren Tech

Welcome to the most secure, most exclusive, and most utterly unnecessary security system in the world.

Our team of expertly-trained hamsters will monitor your every move, detect any anomalies, and alert you to any potential threats.

But wait, there's more! Our system also includes:

• Hamster Cam - Watch our hamsters at work as they tirelessly monitor your every move.
• Advanced Threat Detection - Our state-of-the-art system can detect a threat from a mile away, or at least from the other side of the room.
• Panic Button - In case things get really bad, just press the button and our team of highly trained hamsters will... well, they'll probably just run away and hide.