The Time I Accidentally Superglued My Socks Together

It was a dark and stormy night, and I was in a rush to get to the office. I had just gotten a call from the boss, and I needed to fix the Johnson report. But as I was rushing out the door, I tripped on the cat and face-planted into the washing machine.

I managed to get up, dust myself off, and continue on my way. However, I had left my socks in the washing machine, and when I opened the lid to retrieve them, I was in for a shock. They were stuck together with an impressive amount of superglue.

I had to be pried apart with a hairdryer and a pair of pliers. It took 20 minutes and a few choice words. The boss was not amused.

The Time I Tried to Cook a Steak in the Blender

I had been watching a lot of cooking shows, and I thought I was a regular chef. I decided to try my hand at cooking a steak. I threw it in the blender with a few other ingredients and hit puree.

The result was a fine powder, and a blender that was beyond repair. It took 3 weeks and a small loan from my sister to replace it.

The Time I Got Locked in a Porta-Potty

I was at a music festival, and I saw this Porta-Potty just sitting there, looking lonely. I decided to take it in for a spin, and I got stuck.

I was stuck for 3 hours, listening to the same 3 songs on repeat. When they finally let me out, I was a shell of my former self.

The Time I Tried to Ride a Unicycle on the Highway

I had seen it on YouTube, and I thought it looked easy. I had a unicycle, and I had the highway. What could possibly go wrong?

I managed to ride for 5 minutes before I face-planted into a guardrail. I was lucky to have a good lawyer.

The Time I Spilled Coffee on the Boss's New Car

I was running late, and I didn't have time for coffee. I grabbed a cup and ran out the door. I didn't see the shiny new car, but I heard the sound of my career going down the drain.

The Time I Accidentally Superglued my Shoes Together

This one's a little too close to home. I'm not proud of it, but it happened. Let's just move on.

The Time I Ate the Last Donut in the Break Room

I was in a meeting, and I just couldn't help myself. The last donut was just sitting there, calling my name.

The Time I Got Lost in a Maze

I thought I was a master of mazes. I had solved them all in my day. But this one was different. It was devious, it was cunning.

The Time I Tried to Ride a Horse Down the Stairs

I thought I was a cowboy. I had watched all the movies. But the horse had other plans. It was not impressed.

The Time I Got Stuck in a Tree

I was trying to get a bird's eye view of the city. I climbed the tree, but I got stuck. I had to be rescued by a team of highly trained professionals.

The Time I Accidentally Superglued My Pants Together

This one's a little too close to home. I'm not proud of it, but it happened. Let's just move on.