The Algorithmic Uncertainty Principle

Or, How We Pretended to Know What We Were Doing

Warning: The Algorithmic Uncertainty Principle may cause unintended consequences, including but not limited to:

Existential dread
Self-doubt
Unnecessary coffee consumption

But hey, at least the code is pretty

Suffering from Quantum Supremacy Algorithmic Schrodinger (Note: The Algorithmic Uncertainty Principle is a fictional concept, inspired by the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle, and is meant to be a humorous take on the idea of uncertainty in algorithmic design.)