The 4 A's of Pretending to be Awake
1. Avoidance
Avoidance is the art of pretending that the problem doesn't exist. It's like the old adage goes: "If you ignore it, it'll go away."
2. Amusement
Amusement is the art of laughing at the problem, while secretly freaking out internally. It's like the old joke: "Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's a metaphor for existential dread."
3. Anger
Anger is the art of pretending to be awake when you're really not. It's like the old saying: "I'm not asleep, I'm just conserving energy."
4. Acceptance
Acceptance is the art of pretending to be okay with the fact that you're actually asleep, but just really, really still. It's like the old Zen proverb: "I'm not asleep, I'm just in a state of deep meditation."
Remember, these 4 A's are the keys to mastering the ancient art of pretending to be awake. Practice them well, and you'll be the envy of all your friends.