You've reached the epicenter of all things fowl.
Our esteemed chicken whisperer, Cluck Norris, has been called in to mediate the situation.
Cluck's expertise in chicken psychology and avian behavioral modification is unmatched.
However, due to a series of unfortunate events, Cluck has gone on an unexpected hiatus.
Thus, we're forced to rely on the next best thing: a highly trained team of robotic chicken whisperers.
Please wait while we activate the robotic chicken whisperers.