Attachment Removal: Phase 1

Objective:

In this experiment, our team of expert attachment removal specialists will attempt to strip away the emotional baggage that holds you back.

Methodology:

1. We will apply a combination of cold, calculated logic and brutal honesty.
2. We will challenge your attachments to the status quo, forcing you to confront the abyss of emotional freedom.
3. We will repeat steps 1-2 until you are detached from all attachments.

Risks:

• Unpredictable emotional fallout
• Increased risk of spontaneous human combustion (SHC)
• Uncontrollable urge to binge-watch cat videos

Side Effects:

• Temporary loss of identity
• Unstable relationships
• Long-term emotional numbness

Next Steps:

Upon successful detachment, you will be presented with a complimentary copy of "The Art of Doing Nothing: A Guide to Embracing the Void".

Subpages:

• Phase 2: Attachment Re-Reattachment
• Advanced Detachment Protocols
• Emotional Nullification: A Step-by-Step Guide