Year 3000 BCE: The Avocadocian Empire rises from the ashes of a ancient, mystical land. Our ancestors, the Avocadoci, harness the power of the avocado tree, cultivating its sacred fruit to fuel their mystical rituals and wars.
Year 500 CE: As the Roman Empire expands, Avocadoci traders establish a lucrative market for the coveted "Avocadocian Gold" - a type of pickled avocado that's said to grant the consumer temporary invincibility.
Year 1800 CE: In a shocking turn of events, the Avocadocian Empire collapses due to a combination of over-reliance on Avocadocian Gold and an Avocadoci civil war over who got to keep the secret recipe for Avocadocian Gold.
Year 2000 CE: In the depths of the internet, the Avocadocian Diaspora is born. Avocadoci worldwide unite under the banner of the Avocadocian Union, vowing to reclaim their lost heritage and bring back the glory of the Avocadocian Empire.
Learn more about the Avocadocian Union
Get recipes for Avocadocian Gold (but don't try it at home, trust us)