Bean Subsistence Recipes

For the Modern Survivalist

Because, let's be real, beans are the answer to all of life's questions.

Recipe 1: Bean Soup of the Damned

A hearty, no-frills bean soup that'll keep you going for weeks.

Note: Do not try this at home. Or do, but don't say I didn't warn you.

Hyperlink to more recipes: Back to Bean Subsistence Main Page

Recipe 2: Canned Bean Casserole of Desperation

A classic. Because, let's be real, you're not exactly in the mood for cooking.

Ingredients: 1 can of beans, 1 can of whatever else you found in the pantry.

Instructions: 1. Mix. 2. Heat. 3. Serve. 4. Eat. Repeat.

Side effects: Boredom, despair, and the faint smell of despair.

Hyperlink to more recipes: More Canned Bean Abominations

Recipe 3: The Great Bean Heist

A daring, high-stakes heist where the prize is a pot of beans.

Objective: Steal the beans from the kitchen without getting caught by the in-laws.

Difficulty level: Expert.

Recommended for: The most skilled of bean thieves.

Hyperlink to more recipes: Other Bean Heists

Recipe 4: Bean-Fueled Insurrection

Join the bean-fueled resistance and overthrow the oppressors!

Objective: Use beans to fuel your rebellion and overthrow the government.

Difficulty level: Extremely difficult, but worth it.

Recommended for: The most committed of bean enthusiasts.

Hyperlink to more recipes: Other Bean Rebellions