Neon Blinking: The Art of Disorienting Your Senses

Warning: Neon Blinking may cause seizures, disorientation, and spontaneous outbursts of "I'm a human disco ball!"

Our expert instructors will teach you the techniques to blink like a pro:

• Blink-Reading: The Fine Art of Blurring Words
• Blink-Driving: Because Who Needs Traffic Lights?

But wait, there's more! Learn how to:

• Blink-Scripting: The Art of Writing with Your Eyes Closed

Side effects of Neon Blinking may include:

• Spontaneous combustion of fashion sense
• Temporary blindness to good taste
• Long-term damage to your eyesight (not really)