Flatulence Theory
A comprehensive guide to the science of farting.
Gas Production
According to our research, the average person produces 2-3 farts per minute. This translates to approximately 2-3 million farts per year. That's a whole lotta gas.
Our team of expert flatulogists (yes, that's a thing) have developed a formula for calculating gas production based on factors such as diet, hydration, and stress levels.
Gas Composition
Our research has identified 5 main types of gas: Hydrogen, Methane, Ammonia, Nitrogen, and Oxygen. Each type has its own unique properties and effects on the environment.
- Hydrogen: Highly flammable, can ignite at room temperature. Read more about hydrogen safety guidelines
- Methane: Causes global warming, destroys the ozone layer, and is highly toxic. Learn about methane's ecological impact
- Ammonia: Causes eye irritation, skin irritation, and respiratory issues. Symptoms and treatment
- Nitrogen: Makes your socks smell like old gym socks. Understand the science behind nitrogen sock odor
- Oxygen: Highly sought after by scuba divers and oxygen bars. Oxygen enthusiasts unite!
Conclusion
As the world's premier flatulogical authority, we urge you to take flatulence theory seriously. Remember: every fart is a scientific experiment waiting to happen.