Warning: The following document is classified TOP-SECRET. Reading this may cause permanent damage to your sanity.
In the early hours of January 1, 1987, a most peculiar incident occurred at the prestigious Institute for Neuro-Scientific Research (INSR). Dr. Emily E. Brain, renowned expert on brain fertilization, was in the midst of conducting an experiment involving the mass implantation of 1000+ neural implants on a willing participant, Bob.
As the clock struck 12:00 AM, the lights flickered, and the room plunged into darkness. The participant, Bob, began to scream incoherently as his brain started to... well, you'll have to read the full report for the details.
For the sake of research, we have included a series of interviews with the key personnel involved, as well as an analysis of the incident. But be warned: what you are about to read may leave you questioning the very fabric of reality.
Eyewitness Statement - January 1, 1987
Appendix I: The Biblical Connection
Or, if you're feeling particularly adventurous, you can try to Appendix II: The Heretical Theory
(Please note: the above links are highly experimental and may cause unintended side effects.)
Please be advised that the following content is not intended to be taken seriously. The INSR, its researchers, and its affiliates disclaim all responsibility for the events described in this report.
Unless you are a licensed expert in the field of brain fertilization, do not attempt to replicate the procedures described in this document. In fact, do not even think about trying.
And for the love of all that is sane, do not try to contact Dr. Brain for comment or clarification. She's still trying to live down the shame of that fateful New Year's Day.
© 1987, INSR. All rights reserved. Or do we?