Welcome, employees of Department 42. Today's meeting will be exactly like the last one, except we've added more chairs. And a whiteboard. And a speakerphone. And a 10% raise. Probably.
The meeting was called to discuss the discussion we had last week. But since we've already had that discussion, we'll be having another discussion. Because, reasons.
Free Coffee: Because We're Trying to Save Money
Free Donuts: Because We're Trying to Save Our Souls
Free Lunch: Because We're Trying to Save Our Lives
Free Parking: Because We're Trying to Save Our Sanity
Free Everything: Because We're Trying to Save Our Dignity
Warning: Prolonged Exposure to Interminable Meetings May Cause: Dizziness, Confusion, and/or Loss of Productivity. Prolonged Exposure May Also Cause: Loss of Sane Thoughts, Loss of Sane Friends, and/or Loss of Sane Sanity. Prolonged Exposure May Result in: The Involuntary Transformation into a Bureaucratic Zombie.