Article 1: The Sock Shall Not Be Confined
We stand in solidarity with the socks, those most misunderstood and mistreated of all footwear. It is our duty to establish clear guidelines for their proper care, maintenance, and utilization.
All citizens of the Sock Realm are entitled to wear their socks in comfort, without fear of being lost to the void. We hold that the wearer shall not be forced to wear mismatched socks, and that all socks shall be treated with the dignity they deserve.
We propose the immediate construction of a Sock Preservation Society, dedicated to the research and development of Sock-related technologies. This includes but is not limited to: Sock-Dispensing Machines, Sock-Repurposing Initiatives, and Sock- Archaeological Expeditions.