Assurance 12 Requirements

The Official Bureaucratic Document

Section A: Mandatory Procrastination

1. Bureaucrats must be seen on camera, at all times, in order to be taken seriously.

2. All meetings shall be held on Fridays at 3:00 PM sharp.

3. The color red shall never be used, lest it be for a fire drill.

Section B: Optional Procrastination

1. The coffee machine shall be serviced at least once a week.

2. All reports shall be printed on 80 lb paper, no less.

3. The stapler shall be kept fully stocked at all times.

Continue to Appendix 12 for additional requirements.