Assurance 12: The Terms of Service

Subpage: Required Documents

Section 1: Important Stuff

We promise not to be too annoying, but we reserve the right to do so.

By using our website, you agree not to use our website in any way that might get us in trouble.

If you don't understand something, just pretend you did.

Or don't. We won't judge you.

Section 2: Our Rights

We own everything.

You can use it, but don't get too attached.

We might take it back, and you'll be sad.

We're not saying we will, but we might.

Subsection: What We Won't Take Away

Your freedom of thought.

Your freedom to wear plaid pants.

Your freedom to eat pizza for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

But don't get too comfortable, because we might take those away too.

Subsection: What We Won't Do

We won't make you listen to elevator music.

We won't make you watch paint dry.

We won't make you attend meetings about meetings.

We might make you listen to elevator music, but only if you ask nice.

Go to Section 3: The Fine Print