Union Benefits: A Guide to Doing Absolutely Nothing

Welcome to the Union Benefits guide, where we'll be exploring the many ways in which union members can do nothing and get away with it. From getting paid for simply showing up, to free coffee and a lawyer, we've got all the ways to make your union membership truly pay off.

But wait, there's more! With our exclusive union benefits, you'll be able to take advantage of:

• Four weeks of paid vacation, just for thinking about it.
• Free membership to our Union Bingo nights.
• Complimentary union-branded socks for every occasion.
• A 50% discount on union-approved napping schedules.