In accordance with the highest standards of bureaucratic efficiency, the Bureaucratic Bureaucracy has established the following protocols for optimal procedure.
Step 1: Fill out form 27-B/6 in triplicate.
Step 2: Attach supporting documentation, preferably in triplicate as well.
Step 3: Wait six months for a response.
For further information, please refer to Section 2: The Six-Month Wait.
Due to the overwhelming volume of paperwork, all responses will be delayed by at least six months.
This ensures that our staff has ample time to review and process your request, and to contemplate the meaninglessness of existence.
For further information, please refer to Section 3: The Meaninglessness of Existence.
In the grand tapestry of the universe, our bureaucratic procedures are but a mere thread.
As such, we recommend that you take a long, hard look at the abyss of nothingness that stares back at you.
For further information, please refer to The Abyss of Nothingness.