Welcome, connoisseur of the finer things in life! We're glad you found our shop, where the art of hydration meets the luxury of excess.
This bottle is made from the tears of a rare, exotic glacier, harvested under the light of a full moon by our team of expert water sommeliers.
Witness the breathtaking spectacle of the Aurora Borealis in a bottle, harvested from the wisps of solar wind and infused with the essence of champagne.
Drink in the mystery of the cosmos with our Mercury Water Bottle, made from the tears of the planet's smallest and most elusive celestial body.
Don't forget to pair it with our complimentary space helmet, sold separately, for the true space-age experience.
We guarantee that this water bottle will make you the most interesting person at any dinner party, or your money back, plus a side of free oxygen.
Prices may vary depending on your level of desperation. Currently, our prices are:
| Price: | Includes: |
|---|---|
| $1,000,000 | A bottle of water that's slightly wetter than a regular water bottle. |
| $1,500,000 | A bottle of water, plus a complimentary side of champagne to make you forget about the crushing ennui of existence. |
We're not responsible for any damage caused by our products, including but not limited to: bursting water bottles, spontaneous combustion of the buyer, or the sudden urge to reevaluate one's life choices.
Don't miss out on this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to own the most expensive water bottle in the world! Buy now, or forever live with the regret of not owning the most expensive water bottle in the world!