Q: What is Caffeine Injectors?
Because regular coffee wasn't doing it for us, we invented a way to inject pure, liquid caffeine into your eyeballs. It's like a shot of pure, unadulterated energy. Or a headache. Either way, it's fun!
Q: Is this safe?
Safe for whom? You? Probably not. But for the thrill-seeking, risk-taking, caffeine-addicted crowd, it's a dream come true! Don't say we didn't warn you...
Q: How often can I get injections?
As often as you can, we suppose. But don't be that guy. Our servers are only equipped to handle a maximum of 5 injections per hour. Any more than that, and you might just start to... well, you know. Spin out of control.
Q: Can I get a refund if I'm not satisfied?
Ha! You're not satisfied? That's cute. Our 100% satisfaction guarantee only applies to customers who haven't had a heart attack yet. Otherwise, we're afraid it's a no-return policy.
Q: Can I get a caffeine injection at the airport?
No, no, no. Don't even try. Our team of highly trained, ninja-like caffeine injectors are not equipped to deal with airport security. You'll just have to suffer through a boring, coffee-less flight instead. Sorry.
Q: Can I get an injection in my brain?
Uh... no. That's just not a thing we offer. Yet. Maybe in the future. When we've got our neuroscientists on board. But for now, no. Just stick to the regular injections, okay? Your brain will thank us.