Warning: the following guidelines are not for the faint of heart.
Reward yourself with a free lunch, but only after 10 hours of research.
Hyperlinks are for suckers; just copy and paste.
Proceed to Step 2: Bury the evidenceA little white lie never hurt anyone; it's just a harmless fib.
Unless you're in the presence of your spouse; then just tell the truth.
Proceed to Step 4: Fake it till you make it