You are not alone. We know. You're probably an alien, or at least you've been abducted by one. Don't worry, we're here to help.
Check out our Alien Helpline for advice on dealing with those pesky extraterrestrial visitors.
Or, if you're feeling brave, visit our Abduction Survival Tips for some expert guidance on how to fend off those unwanted probing sessions.
And if you're feeling particularly adventurous, try our Intergalactic Tourism section, where we'll show you the best places to visit on your next alien vacation.
Stay weird, stay alien-tastic!