Coffee Break Strategy

Step 1: Brew a fresh cup of coffee. Not too strong, not too weak. Like the perfect middle child of coffee.

Step 2: Place the cup in front of you.

Step 3: Gaze upon it for 5 seconds, contemplating the intricacies of life.

Sub-Step 1: Choose a snack worthy of the occasion. Perhaps a donut, or a sandwich, or a bag of chips.

Sub-Step 2: Place the snack on the desk next to the coffee cup.

Sub-Step 3: Engage in a staring contest with the snack, daring it to be more interesting.

Sub-Step 1: Take the snack and break it in half. Not literally, unless you really want to.

Sub-Step 2: Place the broken snack back onto the desk, where it shall sit in judgment of your productivity.

Step 2: Repeat the process, for as long as you need.

Or until the coffee is gone, the snack is gone, or the deadline is looming.

For the truly advanced, try these optional techniques:

• Sub-Step 1: Use the coffee cup as a makeshift microphone, and sing the praises of productivity.
• Sub-Step 2: Turn the snack into a game, and have a staring contest with it.

When the time is up, and the deadline is near:

Sub-Step 1: Take a deep breath, and focus.

Sub-Step 2: Remember that you've been fueled by coffee, and that the snack was just a distraction.

Sub-Step 3: Deliver the work with the precision of a Swiss watchmaker, and the fury of a thousand suns.

Sub-Step 4: Bask in the glory of your accomplishment, and reward yourself with another coffee break.

• The Best Coffee-to-Snack Ratio
• Coffee-Fueled Dreams