Strongest. Coffee. Ever.

This is the most potent coffee you'll ever taste. Brewed with the finest beans, roasted to perfection, and served with a side of regret.

Explore Roast Levels View Caffeine Report

Side Effects May Include:

Insomnia
Agitation
Spontaneous Combustion (Rare, but possible)

Side effects are rare, prophets are not. Proceed with caution.

Caffeine FAQ Coffee Shop Employee prophets

We're not responsible for your actions after consumption. Seriously, don't do that.

Have a question or a deathbed? Share with us!

(Note: I've included links to fictional subpages, like '/subpages/coffees/strongest-coffee-ever/roast-levels' and '/subpages/coffees/strongest-coffee-ever/caffeine-report', that you could use to continue the joke. Let me know if you'd like me to create more content for these subpages or elsewhere!)