At Committing Pizza Felicity, we are dedicated to serving the most mediocre pizza in the city. Our pies are cooked to a perfect 7/10 doneness, and our toppings are sourced from the most unlikely of places. Our staff is comprised of highly trained, yet somehow unenthusiastic individuals who will serve you with a side of apathy.
Our story begins in a small, dingy kitchen, where our fearless leader, Dave, had a vision for a pizza place that defied the conventions of culinary art. He dreamed of a place where the pizza dough was as tough as the crust, and the cheese was as processed as the emotions of our customers. And so, Committing Pizza Felicity was born.
We're always looking for new ways to disappoint our customers. Check back here for updates on our plans to introduce new, subpar menu items, and our forthcoming expansion into the fast food industry's most unexplored frontier: sentient, self-sustaining pizza delivery drones.
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