Are you tired of being ordinary? Do you crave the rush of adrenaline that comes with pushing yourself to the limit?
Look no further than the Speed Demon Squad, a group of daredevils who will challenge you in the most intense, most ridiculous, most completely-not-suitable-for-actual-human-beings way possible.
As a member of the Speed Demon Squad, you'll be competing in absurd events like the 100m dash while juggling chainsaws, the 400m freestyle while reciting Shakespearean sonnets, and the 200m hurdles while balancing on one foot.
Don't worry, we'll provide the necessary safety gear (a helmet, a fireproof suit, and a team of highly trained medical professionals on standby). You bring the courage, or lack thereof.
Sign up now and get ready to join the ranks of the truly insane.
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