CONFORMITY MANIFESTO

Article I: The Inevitability of Conformity

We, the undersigned, do hereby acknowledge that conformity is the natural state of human existence. We recognize the inevitability of assimilating into the norms of the dominant culture. Our collective destiny is to wear the same clothes, eat the same food, and think the same thoughts.

Article II: The Futility of Rebellion

We, the undersigned, do hereby confess that attempts at individuality are but a fleeting dream. Our rebellions are met with crushing indifference. Our nonconformity is reduced to a quaint relic of a bygone era.

Article III: The Triumph of Homogeny

We, the undersigned, do hereby celebrate the triumph of sameness. Our diversity is but a distant memory. Our uniqueness is but a mythic past, lost to the ages.

• Standardization of Thought
• Revisions and Amendments