Section 1: General Nonsenses

Section 1.1: You're Probably Not Reading This

We're glad you're here, I suppose. Please do not bother trying to make sense of this, as it's probably just a waste of time.

By using our services, you agree to the following: you will be mildly amused, occasionally annoyed, and never actually read this.

Section 1.2: What We Mean By "Services"

Section 1.3: The Fine Print

Section 1.4: Disagreements and Lawsuits

Section 1.5: The "Terms" Part

Section 2: Your Data (Or Lack Thereof)

Section 2.1: We're Not Actually Collecting Anything (Or Are We?)

Just kidding. We're collecting everything. Don't look at us.

But seriously, we do collect some data. Like, a lot of data. It's not like you're not already being watched by the man, right?

Section 2.2: Cookies, Cookies, Everywhere

Section 2.3: The Fun Part (Where We Sell Data)

Section 2.4: Opting Out (Ha! Like That's Going to Work)

Section 3: The End (Of Our Interest in This)

Congratulations, you made it to the end! Now, if you'll excuse us, we have better things to do than write more of this fine print.

See you never.

Sign the dotted line (or don't, we won't judge)