By Order of the Supreme Cookie Ruler, all cookies must be eaten with a minimum of 4.2 seconds of deliberate, unadulterated glee.
Any cookie consumption without such glee will be subject to Cookie Reversal Protocol 345, where the cookie eater will be forced to watch an endless loop of elevator music for 37 hours and 14 minutes.
Exceptions to this mandate include:
Failure to comply will result in Cookie Repercussions, including but not limited to: