The Cookie Law of the Land

A law so old, it predates your grandma, but still relevant today

By the power vested in me, I, CookieLawyer McLawface, hereby declare that all cookies shall henceforth be considered a legitimate form of currency. All citizens of the land shall be entitled to cookies, but only if they have fulfilled the following conditions:

• You must first have consumed a minimum of 500 calories worth of pizza
• You must have completed at least 3 hours of gaming on a Saturday
• You must have spent at least 1 hour in a bathtub, pondering the meaning of life

Failure to meet these conditions shall result in the immediate removal of your cookie privileges. Don't say we didn't warn you.

Cookie Privileges

• Privilege 1: To wear a cookie-print onesie to any social gathering
• Privilege 2: To claim that your cookie jar is, in fact, a decorative vase
• Privilege 3: To have a cookie named after you, which shall be a sentient, talking cookie

Apply for your cookie privileges now, or forever be known as a cookie-less soul!

Don't wait any longer, citizen! Apply now, or risk being cast into the great cookie-less void!