Cookie-induced Comas: The Dark Side of the Cookie

Warning: The following content contains excessive sugar and potentially hazardous amounts of happiness.

Causes:

• Too Many Oatmeal Raisins
• Excessive Use of Sprinkles
• The Cookie Crust Conundrum

Treatments:

• Immediate administration of cold water.
• Removal of all sugar-based snacks for 30 days.
• Enrollment in a rigorous cookie-replacement program.

Side Effects:

• Catastrophic sugar highs.
• Irreversible cookie cravings.
• Bouts of unrelenting happiness.

Disclaimer:

This site is not responsible for any damage caused by cookie-induced comas. Please do not attempt to recreate the recipes or treatments without consulting a medical professional.