Oatmeal Raised Cookies

A classic cookie with a modern twist. Made with rolled oats, sweetened with a hint of cinnamon, and a dash of sarcasm. Because, let's be real, who needs a social life when you have oatmeal cookies?

Here's what you need:

• 1 cup rolled oats
• 1/2 cup brown sugar
• 1/2 cup white granulated sugar
• 1/2 cup butter, softened
• 2 eggs
• 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
• 1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
• salt to taste

Instructions:

1. Preheat your oven to 375°F (190°C). Don't bother trying to get your cat to help you. That'll just end in frustration and cookie crumbs all over the kitchen.
2. Whisk together oats, sugars, and spices in a large bowl. Don't bother using a whisk. A spoon will do, but where's the fun in that?
3. In a separate bowl, cream together the butter and eggs. Try not to get too distracted by the cat watching you from the windowsill.
4. Combine the wet and dry ingredients. Stir in a few extra oats if you feel like a rebel.
5. Scoop out balls of dough, roughly 1-2 Tbsp each. Place on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper. Don't overfill the sheet. That's just asking for a cookie catastrophe.
6. Place the baking sheet in the oven and bake for 12-15 minutes, or until the cookies are lightly golden brown. Let them cool, because who needs cookies that are still warm when they should be cold?

Now, go forth and bake. Or, if you're feeling lazy, order a cookie from the nearest bakery. But let's be real, that's not the same, is it?