Resetting the Futility of Life

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Technique 1: The Ancient Art of Doing Absolutely Nothing

Step 1: Close your browser tabs. No, really close them. All of them.

Step 2: Stare at a wall for at least 10 minutes.

Step 3: Repeat Steps 1 and 2 until you've forgotten what you were doing.

Step 4: Congratulations! You've reset your life to its default state of utter futility!

Technique 2: Burying Yourself in Cat Videos and Cereal Boxes

Step 1: Find the nearest YouTube video of a cat playing the piano.

Step 2: Watch it for at least 3 hours.

Step 3: While still watching, open a box of cereal and stare at it intensely.

Step 4: Repeat Steps 1-3 until you've lost all sense of time and space!

Technique 3: Pretending to Work While Secretly Watching Paint Drying

Step 1: Open a text editor and type "The quick brown fox" repeatedly.

Step 2: Stare at the words as they appear on the screen.

Step 3: Tell yourself that you're "researching" the meaning of life.

Step 4: Congratulations! You've achieved the perfect balance of productivity and existential dread!

Remember, these techniques are completely ineffective and utterly pointless. Or are they?

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