The Creepiness Scale

Assessing the Creepiness of Your Neighbor

Are you concerned about the creepiness of your neighbor? Let us help.

Our Creepiness Scale is a scientifically unrigorous, totally-not-a-research-project method for determining the creepiness of your neighbor.

How to Use the Scale:

  1. Observe your neighbor's behavior for a minimum of 30 minutes.
  2. Note the frequency and nature of their interactions with you and other neighbors.
  3. Assign a creepiness score based on the following scale:
1/10: They only wave at me. 2/10: They borrow my tools without asking. 5/10: They have a 'Welcome to my abode' doormat, but I'm pretty sure they're just trying to get inside my brain. 7/10: They know the name of every cat that's ever lived in my house. 9/10: They're in your yard, staring at your garden gnomes. 10/10: I'm pretty sure they're secretly a shapeshifter, and their eyes are following me everywhere I go.

Disclaimer:

Our Creepiness Scale is not intended for use in actual law enforcement, medical, or psychological settings. It's just for fun. Don't @ us.

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