Welcome to Crypto-Market-Analyzis: Where Speculation is an Art Form

We're glad you asked. Here's a brief rundown:

• Quantum Uncertainty Theory: Because, you know, it's not like we're just making it up as we go...
• Algoritmik Trading for Noobs: A Crash Course in Futility
• Blockchain Technology: Because Decentralized is just a fancy word for "We're Not Responsible"

Our Methodology:

We use a combination prophets, tarot cards, and a Ouija board to predict the market. It's science!

Our Team:

We have a team of experts who have collectively lost a small fortune in the market. We're pretty sure they're not biased or anything.

• Bobby Johnson: Expert in all things crypto and also expert in nothing else
• Steve "The Algorithm" Robotics: Our resident algo expert and also our resident weirdo