Curry Coconut Chips FAQ

Q: Why do you even bother with these things?

We bother because, let's face it, someone has to.

Q: Are they actually worth it?

Depends on who "it" is. If by "it" you mean the existential dread of eating something truly terrible, then yes.

Q: What is the secret to making them not terrible?

The Secret to Not Being a Disaster

It starts with a dash of desperation, a pinch of hope, and a healthy fear of being alone in the dark, surrounded by the remnants of a failed snack.

Step 1: Choose the Right Curry

It's all about balance. Too much curry and you'll be drowning in a sea of spice and regret. Too little and it's just sad.

• 1.5% of the time, add more.
• 1.5% of the time, take it away.

Step 2: Select the Correct Coconut Chips

Don't even think about it. Just get the ones with the most coconut. It's like a law of physics.

Continue to Step 3: The Fateful Mixing of Ingredients

Step 3: The Fateful Mixing of Ingredients

Where the rubber meets the road, or in this case, where the coconut meets the curry.

1. Melt the butter. All the butter.
2. Combine it with the curry. All the curry.
3. Stir in the coconut flakes. Don't think about it.
4. Pour it all over the chips. Hope for the best.

Continue to Step 4: The Desperate Hopes and Dreams

Step 4: The Desperate Hopes and Dreams

A time to hold on to hope, when all that's left is the bitter taste of disappointment.

Pray for the best, and hope the chips don't hate you back.

Side Effects May Include:

• Clogged arteries
• Spontaneous combustion of flavor
• Temporary loss of sanity

Continue to Step 5: The Final, Desperate Plea

Step 5: The Final, Desperate Plea

When all else fails, just eat the whole bag. Who needs dignity, anyway?

Side effects may include:

• Burst stomach
• Regret
• Temporary loss of taste buds