After careful consideration, our team has decided that colonizing other planets is the key to humanity's survival. And by "careful consideration", I mean we just really want to be the first ones to plant our flag on another planet.
Here's a breakdown of our current plans:
- Establishing a human settlement on Mars within the next 50 years.
- Conquering Venus with our fleet of robotic, heat-resistant vacuum cleaners.
- Moving Mercury's asteroid belt to a more... Mercury-like location.
We're looking for volunteers. Or, you know, just people who want to be famous in space.