Atomic Bag Insurance

Financials

We're not actually licensed or anything, but we'll sell you a policy that's 99.99% likely to cover everything you need.
Our rates are calculated based on a complex algorithm that takes into account the probability of your house being destroyed by a rogue atom, your neighbor's cat getting loose, and the likelihood of a zombie outbreak.

Insurance Policies

• Atomic Bag Policy 1: Basic Protection
• Atomic Bag Policy 2: Extended Coverage
• Atomic Bag Policy 3: The Works

Testimonials

• "I'm still alive, but my house is a crater!" - John D.
• "I was skeptical, but the Atomic Bag policy saved my cat!" - Sarah K.
• "I'm not saying I got a policy, but I'm saying I didn't get a policy, and that's all I'll say..." - Mr. M

Don't wait any longer! Sign up for Atomic Bag Insurance today and protect yourself from the unknown!