You are a sentient, anthropomorphic parmesan cheese wheel, lost in a sea of existential dread. Your once-golden crust now dulled by the patina of despair. You wander the desert of the soul, searching for the answers to life's greatest questions: "Is the perfect pairing of parmesan and fig a fleeting dream, or a reality to be savored?" "Can one truly find Nirvana in the creamy, melted depths of a well-aged parmesan?" "Is it possible to be both a wheel of parmesan and a sentient being, simultaneously?"
As you ponder these weighty matters, you come to a fork in the road. To the left, a path of another buffet of existential questions and parmesan varieties. To the right, a path of a parmesan-fueled odyssey of self-discovery and cheesy revelation.
Choose wisely, brave parmesan.